John Maxwell once said, “The truth is that teamwork is the heart of great results.” There are many things that can be learned by playing sports and that can be carried forward into the rest of life. At first, you can’t see how team play applies to other relationships, but there are many things that are directly related, including working with those you can’t see with conflict resolution and healthy communication. The definition of teamwork according to Google is “the combined action of a group of people, especially if effective and efficient”. But that doesn’t give us a complete picture of what teamwork is and how it can help your relationships.
You can’t do it all by yourself
A good relationship between two people requires both of them to do their part. This is a lesson to be learned in any team sport. No matter how good a quarterback is, he can’t win the game alone. The quarterback needs people to block for them, catch the ball they throw, and play defense when the other team is on offense. There is no position in one team that is more important than another. There are some positions that get more attention in the public eye than others, but it is through the work of each person in their position that allows a team to be good and effective. Even the best player, if only, wouldn’t be able to accomplish anything without his team.
Legendary football manager Vince Lombardi’s definition of teamwork is: “individual engagement in a team effort – this is what makes the teamwork, a company works, a company works, a civilization works.” A relationship is exactly the same way. They are two people who work together and are committed to seeing the success of the relationship.
There are many times in sports when you see a player on a team working hard to win the game. They are completely online, and everything they are doing is right. But, if the teammates around them aren’t doing their part, it’s still nearly impossible for the team to win a match.
There is no “me” in the “team”
If you have ever played sports before, you have probably heard the phrase “there is no ‘me’ in ‘team'”. This fits the definition of teamwork perfectly and certainly applies to relationships as well. When a teammate is selfish, it usually hurts the whole team. When a person in a relationship is selfish, it can damage the whole relationship. If you want to improve the relationship you are in, it is important that you put the other person first. Or, at the very least, consider their feelings as much as their own.
When there is a ball-eater on a basketball team, the rest of the team quickly becomes frustrated with this individual. They feel like that person doesn’t value what they bring to the team. This leads to bitter feelings and often a split in the team. Many times, the ball boy is surprised by this because he feels that the work he is doing is for the good of the team. Instead of seeing how they are undermining the value of other players, they look at what they are offering to the team as a whole. Often, underneath this person also thinks that the only way to win is to carry the team on the shoulders. He is not placing any trust in the other team members. This is a dangerous way of thinking in a team or in a relationship.
When an individual makes a relationship all about himself or thinks he is the only one working on the relationship, it damages the relationship. There may be the letter “I” in the word relationship, but a relationship cannot function successfully if it only focuses on one person.
If you’ve ever watched a good basketball or soccer team play, you’ll immediately notice something about teamwork: the players are so connected and on the same page that they are able to anticipate their teammates’ moves. Think about when a quarterback throws the ball at a catcher. The quarterback must actually throw the ball before the catcher is able to catch it. If they waited for the receiver to be there waiting to take it, the defense would be on top of them. But, when the catcher knows where to run, and the quarterback can anticipate and trust that he will be there, the quarterback is able to throw the ball early.
It works the same way in basketball. If you’ve ever watched a professional basketball game, you’ve probably seen the guard throw the ball near the hoop waiting for the center to jump and take it for an alley-oop. If teammates weren’t able to anticipate what other team members are doing, this wouldn’t be possible.
When you apply this definition of teamwork to a relationship, it can take you to a whole new level. When you know the other person so well that you are able to anticipate what they will need, you are able to move to a new stage in your relationship. This is when you truly know that the other person knows you and that you know them too. This isn’t something that happens immediately in a relationship. It is something that takes time to build.
Big teams can trust each other
Trust is the key to teamwork in the best teams and relationships. To be able to anticipate what will happen during a game or relationship, you need to be able to trust the other person. A quarterback will not throw the ball early to a catcher if he is not confident that the catcher knows the course and is present. A relationship cannot progress without trust. There will be a point where you have grown the relationship as much as possible and then hit a wall if you are unable to trust each other.
Many people struggle with this, especially if they have been hurt in past relationships. Trust is not something that is given freely, but rather something that is earned. This is true both in relationships and in teams. The definition of teamwork we discussed earlier was “the combined action of a group of people”. When people don’t trust each other, it’s very difficult to get them to work together to accomplish something. In a relationship, if you don’t feel like you can trust the other person, you will find it rather difficult to get to a deeper level with them.
Earning trust is something that happens over time. In a sports team, it happens in training. Players practice playing together, in order to build confidence in themselves and in each other’s abilities. There is no practice in relationships. Instead, build trust by showing yourself from time to time. It is about following what you say you want to do and working together in difficult and trying times.
Teamwork involves work
Being part of a team involves work. Your team must work together to learn patterns, build stamina, and win games. A good team supports each other, and they are there for each other after wins and losses. Teammates usually know when another teammate needs to be cheered up and encouraged. And they know when they need to be left alone to process. But, at the end of the day, the great teammates are always there for each other.
Doesn’t it feel like a relationship you would like to have? In a good relationship, two people work hard to get to know each other and to get through tough times together. They know each other and can anticipate what the other person needs. They know when that person needs comfort and when she needs to be left alone. And they can trust each other to do their part. At the end of the day, whether the day was good or bad, I’m always there for each other.
This is the teamwork aspect. While you can start working together as a team at any time, true teamwork takes time to build.
You will never see a team that doesn’t have a manager. This is because the matches are difficult to win. Teams need an outsider who looks inward and who can see things from a different perspective and build a strategy that helps them succeed. In relationships, this person is often known as a therapist or therapist. If you are looking to strengthen your relationship or work through the problems within it, therapists like those from Serenis are available at any time. This is the person who will help you just like a manager helps his team. They will look for areas that need work. He will encourage the areas that are doing well, and he will not be afraid to point out and make a game plan for the areas that are not.
Despite being over 70, 19% of intact couples actually use couple psychotherapy, and only 36% of divorced couples seek it before divorcing. This same study found that the main factors behind this include the social stigma associated with couples psychotherapy, the cost, and the difficulty of scheduling or achieving in-person sessions. However, within the study, online couples psychotherapy was found to be incredibly helpful and eliminate many of these barriers.
Serenis is accessible anytime, anywhere – you just need an internet or data connection to get started. From there, you will be personally matched with a therapist (but you can choose another at any time if you think it is not suitable for you).